Faux Epic: Challenge Epic 01

Some of you know this about me, others might have suspected. I've been in a bit of a funk lately. As it turns out, maybe even for a few years now. I've come to find out that through genetic mutation and/or lifestyle changes I've been a little low on the B12 absorption. For how long exactly I'm not sure. What I can say though is that I've been depressed. I think that it's over now, but I still have to work out some specifics with my doctor.

I have had a ridiculously hard time doing much of anything the last few years especially in terms of drawing.(For some reason, exercising and dieting weren't. I'd be curious to know what that says about me or where those desires are stored in the brain.) It was incredibly hard to focus on anything and it was way too easy to say to myself "it wasn't good enough" or "I wasn't talented enough". (Not that this isn't an issue when I'm not depressed.) Many projects, both personal and with others, fell by the wayside because I just couldn't get myself going. To those people I apologize.

The shocking thing was how taking a B12 nasal spray almost immediately snapped me out of it. I had lost my ability to hope. It was inhibited. It came on so slowly I just figured I was suffering from a thirty something's expectation vs. reality.

Coming out of the fog was odd. We tend to take hope for granted, and it was strange feeling that sensation and having to identify it because I hadn't felt it in so long.

I'm lucky. I get to take a nasal spray and return to a normal frame of reference. For those of you I know that have problems with depression because of more than a vitamin deficiency, I truly hope that one day you find your nasal spray or at least you have a network of patient and loving people around you.

At this point you may be asking yourself about the art. A friend had posted on facebook about starting a drawing group, specifically a 30 days of drawing challenge. Seeing as how I was effectively frozen in anxiety and fear for so long it seemed a fitting way to re-enter the world. There were 30 themes for 30 days, and outside of one day where I was too drunk and too far away from my drawing supplies, (Thanks Matt and Shannon) I accomplished this feat. Hope you Enjoy it as much as I did.

Thanks Janet :)

As usual clicking on the images will show you a larger version. Right clicking and selecting "view image" will show you the picture at its true size.

Day1: Self-Portrait.

Day 2: Line

Day 3: Tone

Day 4: Color

Day 5: Critter

Day 6: Master's Copy http://www.rockwell-center.org/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/leyendecker-cover.jpg

Day 7: Draw in the Style of your Master's Copy (from photo)

Day 8: Inside

Day 9: Outside

Day 10: Shoes (I call this one a Shoelogy, :) I was proud of that one)

Day 11: Fabric

Day 12: Dream

Day 13: From Same Source Material (It was based off a picture of a castle which I spruced up, only to find out that it was a pic of Hogwarts, so fitting)

Day 14: Hands (started out realistic then it just turned. . .)

Day 15: Food

Day 16: Liquid

Day 17: Portrait

Day 18: Text ( I was out of time exhausted and uninspired. You can see some of what I drew and erased on the page. In the end, my solution, which I thought was quite clever at the time, was to riff on Duchamp's Fountain.